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Pleasure in Pain.



I seek...
Pleasure in Pain.

That undone tie, appears as a rope.
I want this Earth to crack from where I stand and let the reason be unexplained.
I enjoy blithesome bunch of folks around but I don't wish be one of them.

At times,
I want to sit in dark. 
And cry hard. HARD.
It gives me immense satisfaction. Strange?
I know this is strange.

Count me in that bunch of sick people.
I know I would hate what I'm writing when I escape from this phase of despondency.

As for now,
I want my heart to be broken.
I want to be disrespected.
I want to be abused.
I want an agonized cry.
I know I've hurt my own people__I am woebegone.
I betray the one's I'm betraying other's for.
I pretend to be oblivion towards how much I hurt.
I'm audacious while expressing fury, fully aware that my words pierce the heart of the listener.
I am Shameless.
Am I doing any good? __Not even to My-Own-Self.

I know it is not the end of the world and I have a lot to explore and bla bla.

But,
Diverting my attention is not a job as easy as drawing those curtains and letting the ray of hope in.
Especially, when I seek pleasure in this agony.
And I swear I don't exaggerate.
I don't need any company.
I'm aware nobody cares.
Neither, do I want any.
Solitude heals me.
No chirping of birds, no Music, no man can soothe me.
I don't WISH to feel good,
Convivial,
Lighthearted.
You ask me to swim. I'd prefer a swamp.

Masochism.

 This is my Legal Drug.

Comments

  1. Rakshit4 May 2013 at 09:35

    HaTs oFf!
    iTs jUsT AwEsOmE!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown17 June 2013 at 06:47

    This is so Good. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I Express17 June 2013 at 07:58

    Thank you! :')

    ReplyDelete
  4. Unknown9 July 2014 at 13:04

    Fuck. This is fucking beautiful but I hate that you wrote it. I don't want you to feel this way. :( I love you. Damn, the words though....*slow clap*

    ReplyDelete

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